Releasing Art

Since I can remember, I have been an artist in some form.  I've written poetry and songs.  I've drawn countless pages of different subjects ranging from cartoons to landscapes.  I've painted.  I've sang.  I've taken photos.  I've created jewelry.  I've tried most forms of art and have a great interest in all of them.  However, like most artists, I am quite sensitive to the opinions of others.  

This sensitivity has inhibited me from following dreams and pursuing passions.  It has swallowed me up in the camp of not good enough.  I've dreamed of being a great photographer, but then I think I could never take the kinds of pictures other people would be happy with.  The pressure of pleasing people overwhelms and my dream dies.

I've had dreams of writing a great novel and children's books with lots of different ideas for starting one, and the dream dies because I wonder if anyone would really like my words.  I dream of writing words on this blog that will speak to my readers, and then the dream dies because I see I have 10 followers and I'll never get a true following.  

What if for once, I gave those dreams to God and let Him just work through me without the fear of what others might think?  What if I chose to go all in for once?  What if God actually used my words to show someone how much He loves them?  What if I allow the breath of God to bring me to life and to work through my hands, my art?  It's not really my art anyway, it's all Him.  It's all for His glory.

I want to let go and let God do what He does best and lead.  Instead of me leading the way, I want to freely open myself up to His leading and see where He takes me.  My word for the year was "live".  While reading Ezekiel 37, the Lord spoke to my heart and said "speak to your dry bones, the word of the Lord, and tell them to live."  I knew what He was pointing me to, but I still resisted to truly live and go for it.  

Do you struggle with people pleasing while wanting to follow God?  Let's link arms and work encourage each other to pursue those passions He's placed in us today.

Lord, we lay it all at Your feet today.  We lay down our burdens to take on Your joy.  We lay down our dreams to take on Your plan.  We lay down our abilities to take on Your ability to work through us.  We ask you to give us strength in following You, to be what You've called us to be, and to do what You've called us to do - unashamed.  In Jesus Name, Amen!

Be Still and Rest

I tend to be impatient.  An all or nothing kind of girl, I give up if something doesn't work right after a few tries.  If I exercise and don't see any results in the first week, I give up.  We live in a fast world where everything is get it now.  I mean, I signed up for Amazon Prime so I could get my packages in two days!  Gotta have it now.

But God.  God has a different timeline than we do.  It's not always an instant success or breakthrough.  Sometimes, it takes patience on our part and trust to know that He will bring promises to pass when the time is right.  Sometimes, it's hard to be still and rest in Him.  It's hard to lean into Him and trust that He knows the past, present and future better than we do.  

Oh, friend, that you and I both would put our hope in Him.  That we would both trust that He knows our comings and our goings.  May we both find stillness and rest in Him today, so that as we go about our day, we see Him working all around us.  

What is keeping you from resting in Him today?  Would you join me in leaning into Him today?

Father, we rest in You today.  We put our trust in You and know that You are our beginning and end.  We lean hard into You and ask You to lead us into Your promises, to the yes for our lives and to walk away from the no.  Let us be sensitive to Your leading today.  In Jesus Name, Amen!

31 Days Seeking God

I have been a Christian for a very long time.  I asked Jesus to come live in my heart when I was 5.  I loved Jesus more than anything, going to bed listening to teaching tapes and writing love songs to Jesus by age 7.  I went to Christian school for a few of my elementary school years.  I was in church Sunday morning, Sunday night, and Wednesday night and for any special meetings in between.  I was a teenager in a youth group that went out and ministered several times a month at local churches and street events.  

Somewhere along the way, I learned the art of wearing the mask.  Hiding behind Christian clichés became my life.  After years of hiding, my heart became hard and tired.  I stopped seeking, stopped longing and the wonder of Jesus left.  

Recently, the Holy Spirit spoke to me in the middle of our Pastor's message and said "this is for you."  He was teaching on "seeking the Lord."  Immediately, I knew it was time to take Him at His word.  Jeremiah 29:13-14 (MSG) "When you come looking for me, you’ll find me. “Yes, when you get serious about finding me and want it more than anything else, I’ll make sure you won’t be disappointed.” God’s Decree."

Oh God, I don't want to be disappointed.  I want to seek you with my whole heart.  I want to find you more than anything else.  This has been my prayer for the past month, and I’ve been learning to seek God with fresh eyes.  You know, when you’ve been in a relationship a long time, it is easy to lose that excitement of the new love.  I want that excitement back when I talk about Jesus, when I think of Him.

This 31 day series was born out of a desire to seek God with my whole heart.  To see Him, to hear Him, to know Him.  Join with me, and seek Him with me.  You will not be disappointed to see Him in your everyday life.  One of the rewards of seeking God is getting to know His promises.  The bible says His promises are Yes, and by that we say Amen.  I am going to spend 31 days seeking Him through various promises.  

There are many ways to seek God.  We can seek Him in prayer, worship, His Word, spending time with other believers to be sharpened, and the list goes on.  I hope you will join me and let’s fall back in love with Jesus.  Let’s let Him restore to us the joy of His salvation!

POSTS:

Day 1 - Be Anxious for Nothing
Day 2 - He Will Give Rest
Day 3 - He Will Quiet You by His Love
Day 4 - He is Near to the Broken
Day 5 - He Will Fulfill His Purpose for Me
Day 6 - He is Our Provider
Day 7 - His Grace is Sufficient
Day 8 - He Restores Us
Day 9 - He is Our Peace
Day 10 -  He Cares for You
Day 11 -  He is Faithful
Day 12 -  He is for You
Day 13 -  He is Our Joy
Day 14 -  He Keeps Watch Over Us
Day 15 -  He is Our Helper 
Day 16 -  He is Our Refuge and Strength 
Day 17 -  He Leads Us to Still Waters
Day 18 -  He Gives Us Favor
Day 19 -  His Mercies are New Every Morning
Day 20 -  He Fills Our Hearts Desire
Day 21 -  He is Our Redeemer
Day 22 -  He Makes All Things New
Day 23 -  He is with Us Always
Day 24 -  He Will Strengthen Us
Day 25 -  He is Working in Us
Day 26 -  He Makes All Things Possible
Day 27 -  He Moves Mountains
Day 28 -  He Works All Things for Our Good
Day 29 -  He Will Go Before You
Day 30 -  He is Our Freedom
Day 31 -  He Finished It All

Your Story Matters

I sat in the middle of my bedroom floor with the big purple bin I've lugged around for 20 years.  It's full of memorabilia, pictures, and letters.  Those letters captured my attention this weekend.  I read letters as old as 25 years, and others as new as a year.  While reading through all of the cards and letters, I had a moment where I realized that all of these gifts were a result of God connecting hearts to encourage one another. 

Most authors of the notes sent multiple notes.  Sometimes, the letters were in return for a note I had sent to them.  This was a wonderful reminder from God.  An answer to prayer.  Years later, I am still receiving encouragement from these very notes.  They are fueling my heart to continue to do what I know God has called me to do - encourage others.  I believe I am an encourager.  I love to encourage people.  When asked to describe my perfect job, I've always said it would be a position that allowed me to help someone else shine, and I truly mean that.

The thing is, as an encourager, sometimes your cup can run dry.  Every now and then, a whispered word of hope to someone like me can be life giving.  Hearing that our words helped someone else overcome, well, that gives us the ability to offer words of hope and restoration to others.  Last weekend, I had the privilege of being invited to a bridal shower for a girl I babysat many years ago.  I felt so honored to be a guest and to be able to shower her with blessings for her future.  In return, my cup was full.  The verse Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 was a reminder to me "Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil.  For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow.  But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up!"

God never meant for us to live this life in solitude.  Look, I am an introvert, and I LOVE my solitude.  I love quiet, and I need retreat from the demands of life often.  But, I know that God desires for me to step out of that comfort zone sometimes and invite others into my space.  Come into my home and talk or pray.  Come with me to shop or to lunch.  God desires for me to be a friend, to use the gift of encouragement that He's given me.  

Reading through those letters this weekend gave me a reminder that I matter.  My story matters.  YOU matter. YOUR story matters.  It can often feel so minuscule in the grand scheme of life, but you really do have a story, and it really does need to be heard.  

What has God written on your heart?  What is your story?  Join with me, and let's step out of the boat and walk with Jesus to see where He leads our story.  Be encouraged friend, you are not alone.

That Your Joy May Be Full

I haven't been writing much lately.  It's not that I haven't had much to say, I've just not felt the freedom to say them.  It's almost like God has shut my mouth on purpose.  Partly, I think it's to remind me that He is my source for everything: happiness, peace, creativity, finances, direction, everything that I could possibly need comes from Him alone.

Needless to say, I've also been quiet in real life, too.  It's hard to describe this season because really there are no adequate words.  I love that God uses different times, seasons, vessels and instruments to speak to me and lead me.  Sometimes a song will come on, and it's like He's pouring His love right over me.  Sometimes a dear friend will say just one word that sets off a chain reaction of thoughts that could only come from Him.  Last night, it was in my dream (this happens frequently for me).

I haven't been depressed in a while, but I have felt funky.  I've also been really distant and not pursuing a relationship with the Lord.  I haven't been hiding the word in my heart like I've done for so many years.  A pastor I knew growing up would always say "hide the word in your heart when you don't need it, so when you do need it, it will be there."  I know, the truth is, that we really need the word everyday, but for this purpose, I am using this quote.  

So, last night, I kept hearing the song "this is my commandment that you love one another that your joy may be full."  I wasn't really dreaming, it was more of a prophetic state where I knew God was speaking to my heart and reminding me of His word.  I can't post all of John 15, but that's where we get the command to love so that our joy will be full.

John 15:11-12 "I have spoken these things to you so that My joy may be in you and your joy may be complete. This is My command: Love one another as I have loved you."

The key to complete joy is to love.  Throughout much of John 15, Jesus talks about what it looks like to love and how to love like He does.  Joy found in our things, people, worldly hopes and dreams is temporal and fades quickly.  The joy of a new car fades as soon as the first bill comes and new car smell goes.  Putting our joy on the actions, words or intentions of others will fade as soon as they fail us, because they will.  

However, when joy comes through the Lord, wisdom is born and we are strengthened in that joy.  Not much can move us off that foundation.  Jesus gave us many charges as believers to show people we are followers of Him, but this is the one commandment that He reiterates over and over.  I think there is a reason He would put so much emphasis on love.

John 15:17 "These things I command you, so that you will love one another."

It's like after teaching all this stuff about love, Jesus closes His sermon out with this last thing "love one another."  That's what it all comes down to.  That's where we find our joy.  It's not in the hating of our brothers and sisters in Christ, or even those who have not come to know Him yet.  It's in love that we find our joy.  

Father, thank you for speaking to me in dreams.  Thank you for reminding me to walk in love, and to keep hiding Your word in my heart.  You are so faithful and true, and Your love never fails.  I praise you and I thank you for your goodness and mercy, may they continue to follow me everyday.  May Your love be so evident in my life that joy overflows everywhere I go.  In Jesus Name, Amen!   

Faithful and True

It's a quiet Thursday morning.  There is only about a month left of preschool for my youngest, and these quiet Thursday mornings will turn into a symphony of laughter, excitement, and maybe a little yelling.  He's boisterous, that one.  More on him later.  For now, I write.

When I started this blog 3 years ago, I intended it to be a journal of sorts.  I had a few friends who "followed" me, but not many really read it.  So, I felt free to write about everything.  These friends knew my struggles anyway, so it wasn't news to them.  Over time, it has evolved into something I love doing, and though I may not have hundreds of daily readers, I believe God has called me to it.  

I was trying to come up with some catchy title for my blog, but couldn't think of anything.  I ended up with God is always working in us because I thought about the "Experiencing God" bible study that Todd and I did together.  The ONLY bible study we've done together in 12 years of marriage, sadly.  However, in that study, the thing that struck me most was a part that talked about how God is always working in us, and God reminded me of that when I was trying to come up with a name.  

The point of all this is that lately I've been distant from God.  Not really pursuing Him, at the same time believing He is near and has me quiet for a season.  I don't know if the flood gates are about to open, but I do know that He is working in this quiet season.  He is ALWAYS working in us, even when it feels like we are all alone.  When we are on the mountaintop or the valley's, He's right there working in us.

I don't know who came up with this illustration, but I love it!  I mean, I want it plastered on my walls.  See, I grew up believing the opposite was true.  I believed that God's plan was perfect, straight and had no detours.  I believed that my faith was lacking if I went through a trial, and that for some reason, I might even be in sin if I was walking through a valley.  Tell someone who struggles with self-worth, depression and insecurity that they are in sin, and it just exasperates the issue.  

Instead, over the years, God has been so faithful and true to His word.  He loves me through it all.  His grace IS sufficient for me.  There is purpose in our pain, there is purpose in our suffering, and in our race to the finish line, these things produce character and hope in us.

Romans 5:3-4 "Not only that, but we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, 4 and endurance produces character, and character produces hope"

So, now I can look at a picture like this and see how God has shaped the ups and downs in my life to produce character in me, to give me hope in Him, to know He is continually working on my behalf.  He loves us, friends.  He loves us so much that He has a plan and a purpose for our lives.  He desires to walk with us through the valleys just as much as He is with us in our mountaintop experiences.  Our greatest growth in Him usually takes place in the valley's.  It's through these experiences that He shows His faithfulness in the most intimate ways.

Let me encourage you to find your hope in Him.  I am finding mine in Him.  Let me encourage you, also, that you are not alone.  We all go through ups and downs in life.  Jesus said we would walk through things that wouldn't be fun.  But, we can have confidence that He is faithful to watch over His word and to perform it, and He is the way, truth and life.  He is always faithful and true.  

Do you believe God has a plan for you?  Do you believe you have purpose?  What do you know God has purposed for you to do in life?  

By All Means, Write

Linking up with Lisa-Jo Baker for Five Minute Friday... a couple days late.  Would you click over to her page to learn about this beautiful community of writers who write their hearts out for five minutes every Friday (or Sunday in my case), and link up to encourage one another?  I believe you will be blessed to join us!


I stumbled upon this quote about two months ago, and started a post with just this quote on it.  Then, I got distracted and abandoned the post.  It has stuck with me, and I can't shake that it's meant for all of the arts, including writing.  There is such freedom in the knowledge that all artists struggle with the same voice of doubt in their ability to produce the very art that makes them breathe and come alive.  

“If you hear a voice within you say “you cannot paint,” then by all means paint, and that voice will be silenced.” ~ Vincent Van Gogh

C.S. Lewis, Robert Louis Stevenson, Emily Dickinson, Jane Austen, and many other significant writers throughout history have woven together words that make our imaginations come to life...and then, there's me.  While I will never tell a story like the story tellers of yesterday, God put writing on my heart at an early age.

I remember around age 7, I would write songs of praise and worship to Him.  I once told my mom a poem that God put on my heart, and had no idea that she needed it right at that time.  I remember writing hundreds of letters of encouragement, poetry, journal entries, even a few English papers for some of my peers.  

Somewhere, somehow, I lost the confidence to call myself a writer, or to believe my story mattered.  I believe the voice within me saying "you cannot write".  There is power in our words.  The moment I start to speak those defeating words about myself, I start to live like I believe them.  Life and death flow off our tongues to inspire or breakdown the one who hears or reads our words.  

Speak to yourself words of life so that you can speak to others words of life.  Are you struggling to get the words out that seem buried deep within, to believe that you are a real writer?  I am so there with you, friend.  This has been a very quiet time for me in writing.  Let me encourage you to write something, even if just a word, a sentence, a paragraph.  By all means, write.  

Lord, let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing to you.  Let them bring grace and peace and let me always point others to Jesus and your steadfast love.  In Jesus Name, Amen!