FOOD

Food.  Ahhh, food.  It's not just considered something to sustain us here, it is considered an unhealthy obsession.  Todd and I occasionally call ourselves "foodies".  Although, I'll admit that he will actually eat the weird stuff, and I tend to stick with what is known.  Todd enjoys shows where they eat ALL of the animal, and then some.  He wants to try the Durian fruit, which is native to Asian countries.  Chef Andrew Zimmern, who eats some of the nastiest things ever imagined, compares this fruit to "completely rotten, mushy onions".  However, Todd and I have talked a lot about our "obsession" with all things food.  We love the flavor, the feelings we get from eating, and the enjoyment we get from making new foods.  It's an unhealthy obsession, and truthfully, you can tell by looking at us.  We are both 50+ pounds heavier than the day we married, and both feel lethargic.  It's not just about portion, but also WHAT I put in my mouth.  I tend to go for the junkiest thing you can find on the menu. 

I read an article today "How to Replace Food Cravings with God Cravings" by Whitney Hopler on Crosswalk.com.  Crosswalk distributes daily devotionals and articles to my e-mail inbox.  I really enjoyed the article, and will be printing it out to read daily, weekly or as much as I need to be reminded of the simple truths.  It's obvious stuff, but when you are trying to take back what you've let go, it's hard to see the course you have to take.  When I was at my healthiest weight, my relationship with God was at my healthiest.  I find this very interesting, because, I do believe God sustains us like nothing else can.  When I started moving further and further from God, I was turning to food to comfort me, bring me peace, and fill me with joy.  Instead, I was drowning myself, becoming heavier and more miserable in my own skin. 

Now I am finding myself turning back to the Lord to sustain me.  I am asking God to give me the desire to be healthy.  I am creating a plan to change.  I am asking friends to get involved and keep me accountable.  I am filling my mind with God's word, moving my body, and letting the Holy Spirit guide me.  I am calling sin what it is (gluttony).  I am getting hungry for holiness, and I am learning my emotional triggers.  (These tips in bold were outlined in the article by Ms. Hopler)  Without a doubt, the hours of 4-7pm are my most stressful part of each day.  The rush to make dinner, eat, bathe the kids, bedtime readiness, etc causes an emotional breakdown for me, which leads me to any source of sugar I can find.  All that sugar affects mood, which turns it all into a cycle that is never ending.  I have noticed that about 30 minutes after a sugar rush, I am fully depressed, angry and snippy.  Wow!  What a revelation to come to you in the midst of the nightly rush!

Years ago, we sang a song in church called "As the Deer Panteth for the Water", which was written based on the scripture Psalm 42:1.  I loved that song, and I still do.  The imagery is beautiful to me.  Here are the lyrics:

As the deer panteth for the water,
So my soul longs after you
You alone are my hearts desire,
And I long to worship You.
Chorus:
You alone are my strength, my shield;
To You alone may my spirit yield
You alone are my hearts desire,
And I long to worship You.
I want you more than gold or silver,
Only You can satisfy
You alone are the real joy giver
And the apple of my eye.


Thank God that He is all we need to be satisfied.  He is an ever-present help in our times of need.  He comforts us, protects us, fully loves us.  I thank God for setting me free from the false satisfaction of food.  I am a work in progress.  If you see me eating excessively, or lots of junk, just check in with me.  I am finding this blog to be more helpful to me than I thought it could be!  Not only am I seeking Him more, I am finding out more about me!  I used to journal frequently, and have not done so in years.  Now that I'm getting back to it, there is a deep fulfilled feeling in me.  Praise God for changing me from glory to glory.  2 Corinthians 3:17-18 - "Now the Lord is the Spirit; and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is liberty.   But we all, with unveiled face, beholding as in a mirror the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from glory to glory, just as by the Spirit of the Lord."