A Thankful Heart: Day 11 - Gracious Words

Gracious words are like a honeycomb,
    sweetness to the soul and health to the body.

Proverbs 16:24

Today, I am thankful for gracious words.  I believe if we have nothing else to give, we all have the gift of gracious words.  We may not all be eloquent, and we may not all have the courage to say things we know we should.  But, we all have that gift inside of us.  The bible tells us that gracious words bring life.  They are sweet for the hearer, and health to their body.  

I get to go beyond my regular encouragement gift today and send a book and card to an old friend of my mom's.  She doesn't know she will be receiving mail on Monday, just in time for her Tuesday chemo appointment.  I haven't seen her since her daughter got married, but, I still think of her fondly, even with all of her ups and downs in life.  Her daughter and I have kept in touch more frequently throughout the years.  

I started praying a few weeks ago for ideas to be a blessing, to be the "G.I.F.T." (Giving it Forward Today).  Last week, the Lord started giving me ideas for how to move forward in that as this will be my first of 40 (and beyond) blessings. I am so excited to send her the "Jesus Calling" devotional and a card.  I pray that she will be blessed by it, but most of all, I pray God's word will reach her heart, heal her hurts, and bring sweetness to her soul and health to her body.

Where can you be gracious with your words today?  Who can you bless with this kindness, pouring sweetness over their soul and health to their body?  Once you know, go do it!  You will be blessed by being that blessing to others.

A Thankful Heart: Day 10 - An Explosion of Faith

Joining the Five Minute Friday group again over at Lisa Jo Baker's place.  Won't you go visit her five minute friday page and link up with us?  Today's word prompt is Worship.

In 2003, I wrote in my journal about some things Todd and I were going through.  We made a quick move to Texas from Massachusetts, without jobs lined up.  We had a miscarriage two weeks after we moved here.  Our furniture and belongings took 3 weeks to get to us.  It took us 3 months and 6 months to find jobs.  We spent the little savings we had.  I could go on, but I think you get the idea.  It was just a series of events, one after another.  At the end of the page, I wrote this:

"When God's mercy collides with our worship, there is an explosion of faith that happens on the inside of us."

God's mercy is always available to us.  Mercy is, by definition, undeserved forgiveness.  We can receive God's mercy at any time.  We just have to "receive" it.  Many people go their whole lives never really receiving His great mercy.  

The other part of this statement is "our worship".  The Merriam-Webster dictionary defines worship as "extravagant respect or admiration for or devotion to an object of esteem". Extravagant respect or admiration.  Wow!  How extravagant is your admiration of our Holy God?  I ask that to myself, too.  What can I do to celebrate, to worship my Savior, my God?  

Those of us who have walked with God for a long time know that our faith can be sure-footed and firmly rooted in Him, but our feelings might ebb and flow from time to time.  But, we can have an explosion of faith in us that will take our lives by storm if we will allow ourselves to worship unhindered, whole-heartedly and with complete extravagance for our mighty God.

I'll end with this C.S. Lewis quote "It is in the process of being worshipped that God communicates His presence to men."  

Spend some time today worshiping Him, committing your life to Him and being thankful for His presence in your life.  He wants to communicate with you today.

End.

A Thankful Heart: Day 9 - Catching Up

I'm playing catch up today in many ways.  I haven't written on my blog for the past two days, so I'm writing two days of thankfulness, plus today's thankful note for later.  I'm also cleaning house and getting rid of stuff.  I have a long ways to go, and if I could, I'd bag everything that doesn't have a place and put on the side of the road or call Goodwill to come pick it up.  The deep cleaning stuff will happen once Jacob starts school next week.  

Today I'm thankful for preschool and big kid school.  I love having my babies with me, but I can't get anything done with them here.  On top of that, I'm exhausted pretty much all the time because I keep them busy or just from trying to break up fights all day.  So, I'm resting in thankfulness right now, getting to see the light at the end of the tunnel.  I'm feeling hopeful today. I'm grateful for His goodness to me, and the rest that comes from spending time with him.  I'm looking forward to turning on my praise and worship music and cranking it up throughout the whole house so I can serve my family better.  

Isaiah 40:31 (AMP) "But those who wait for the Lord [who expect, look for, and hope in Him] shall change and renew their strength and power; they shall lift their wings and mount up [close to God] as eagles [mount up to the sun]; they shall run and not be weary, they shall walk and not faint or become tired."

Praise God for this promise of His faithfulness.  Put your hope in the Lord, and he will strengthen you!  He will renew your strength just when you feel like you have nothing left.  Thank you, Lord, for your promises and for your faithfulness to us!

A Thankful Heart: Day 8 - When the Dream Seems Dead

I'll be honest.  The day after I started this thankful heart series, I started feeling incredibly unthankful.  In fact, it was by God's grace that I was able to write anything for 4 of the past 7 days!  The thing is, I press through it.  I didn't give up.  I didn't give up because I believe this is a mandate from God for me to press through the hard times and continue to give him praise and thanks for the things He IS doing in my life.  One word from someone here on earth can make or break your day, but one word from the Lord is life-affirming and life-giving.  

God's word can breathe new life into dead dreams.  One word from Him can change the direction of your life.

Think on that a bit.  I've had lots of dreams in my lifetime.  I have dreamed of becoming a photographer, being a missionary, running an orphanage, traveling the world, and so on and so on.  I look at my journal from my teen years and I'm amazed God could keep up with my mind.  I changed it so much.  None of MY dreams were bad, they just weren't God's dream for me.  I believe I'm just at the beginning of His dream for me.  

I am clinging to His word for me today:  Isaiah 43:18-19 "Remember not the former things, nor consider the things of old.  Behold, I am doing a new thing; now it springs forth, do you not perceive it?  I will make a way in the wilderness and rivers in the desert."

I can tell you without doubt that I have lived in the desert for too long.  His promise to me is that He is making rivers in the desert.  He is bringing living waters to me, right where I am.  He is doing a new thing in me and through me.  He is changing and molding my heart as I press in to Him through the hard days.  

Let me be an encouragement to you.  You can lean on Him on the hard days because He is always faithful and true.  If you find yourself in the desert, drink from the fountain of life.  Lysa TerKeurst recently posted this and it resonated so deep in my heart because it is wisdom and truth:  When God seems silent - 

• Press in to God when you want to pull away.
• Praise God out loud when you want to get lost in complaints.
• Put yourself in the company of truth.

This is spiritual exercise.  Physical exercise is a practice in forming good habits.  Do it daily and it becomes second nature.  Getting to the point of it becoming second nature is one of the most difficult things to do.  Getting started always seems easier when we start "tomorrow".  So it is the same with spiritual exercise.  When you've not made it a practice to spend time in His word, to fellowship with Him, getting started in pressing in to God, praising Him and surrounding yourself with other believers seems like an impossible task.  In the words of Nike "Just Do It".  This is the wisdom that will get you through the hard days.

Press in today.  Do what you need to do to break through the drought, through the dead dreams, through the hard days when everything seems to be falling apart.  Press in.  Give it all to Him, and then give Him glory and praise for the new thing He is doing in you!  Because He IS doing a new thing!

Father, you see our broken hearts, our hurts, our hard days, our bad news days.  You know all of our thoughts, and you love us anyway.  Thank you for your everlasting love, for your new mercies every morning.  Thank you for healing our pain, our brokenness and drawing us closer to you in the process.  Our hearts desire you first and we love you and honor you for the new things you are doing in our lives.  I love you Lord, and I will praise you today with all of my being.  I choose to praise you through the hard days, when my flesh wants to give up.  I ask that you fill me with your strength, with a resolve to press in and continue on in what you've called me to do.  In Jesus Name, Amen!

A Thankful Heart: Day 7 - Becoming a Proverbs 31 Woman

After dinner the other night, I was doing the dishes.  I thought, this is the second set of dishes I'm doing TODAY.  I've washed 4 loads of laundry.  I've swept the floor more times than I can remember, I've polished furniture, rearranged furniture, made beds, etc.  The only thing was that I was thinking all this with a grumbling heart.

I was gently reminded by the Holy Spirit of this old saying I once read:

Thank God for dirty dishes; They have a Tale to tell.

While other folks go hungry, we're eating pretty well.

With home, and health, and happiness,

We shouldn't want to fuss;

For by this this stack of evidence,

God's very Good to us.

-Anonymous

Proverbs 31:27 (AMP) She looks well to how things go in her household, and the bread of idleness (gossip, discontent, and self-pity) she will not eat.

Nothing like God's word to put life in perspective.  My nature is not one of idleness, but I have allowed that way of life to take over my thoughts and actions for the past two years.  I've become more discontent than ever before in my life, and full of self-pity.  I've even allowed gossip to be part of my life when it used to be so foreign to me.  

God loves us even as we are growing in Him, and I believe this is what this series of thankfulness is.  He IS growing me to be more of a Proverbs 31 woman, one who is thankful and does things for her household with a cheerful spirit.  He is working in me day by day to become more like Him, and to walk fully in the call He's placed on my life.  

Oh Lord, I repent for letting idleness become part of my every day life.  I ask your forgiveness and the forgiveness of others that I have offended in this time.  I thank you that your mercies are new every morning.  Let the meditation of my heart and the words of my mouth be pleasing in your sight, Lord.  Help me to know where and when I can be a blessing to others, to take my eyes of myself and to focus them with laser focus on you and those who need you.  I thank you for your guidance and these growing experiences!  In Jesus Name, Amen!

A Thankful Heart: Day 6 - And They're Off

Well, at least one of them is.  My oldest started school today.  I have a love/hate relationship with the school year.  I need and crave routine, and I believe my kids do, too.  I also really love not having to hurry out the door.  Those lazy days feel comfortable and easy.  They allow us to set up a relaxed schedule for when we get out the door, what we want to do, and where we want to go.  It also leads us to be complacent.  I tend to get complacent in my walk with God, in my health, in my eating, in pretty much everything.  I also tend to allow my kids to do the same.

I'm thankful for this first day of school, and not in the way you would think a mom is thankful.  I'm thankful that we are getting back into a routine, that we will be able to focus our attention on learning and growing instead of lounging around and being beach bums.  I don't really "love" my kids going to school away from me, but I know they are growing and becoming important members of society in their growth.

Thank you, Lord, for this school year.  I lift up all the students and teachers to you.  May each one of them be blessed by their growth, and by each other.  I ask that you would bring friends alongside my children that will help them walk more fully in You.  I ask that you give the teachers wisdom and understanding in how to teach each student, and as I cover them in prayer, I thank you for your protection and love toward them.  I pray for your peace that passes all understanding to guard their hearts and minds in Christ.  Thank you, Father, for your loving-kindness, which is better than life.  I praise you, and I thank you for your goodness to us.  In Jesus name, Amen!

A Thankful Heart: Day 5 - The Mess

Today is short and simple.  I found this on More than Enough on Facebook.  I loved it because I am a mess, and it seems like lately I have been seeing more areas of my life that need to tending to.  So, here is what the prayer was on that Facebook page:

Dear Lord, everyone has blind spots.  Areas we can't see clearly in our character that have the potential to cause relational accident.

Will you please help me to be open when people I trust point out traits that could use some refining?  Give me grace to hear the things about me that need to be changed, so I can be more like You.

I can tend to get defensive and upset when others hold me accountable, but today I want to be like iron...sharpened by Your Word and made stronger in Your truths.  Search me and know me, God.  Call out anything in me that is not Christ-like.  And please help me remember that it is for Your glory and I'm still loved and accepted by You.

I couldn't have prayed a better prayer.  I'm thankful that even in my mess, God loves me and accepts me.  

A Thankful Heart: Day 4 - When You're Not Feeling Very Lovable

This promise is one I cling to when I'm feeling my best, when I'm feeling in my worst mood, or when I'm feeling unlovable.  Jeremiah 31:3 "The Lord appeared to him from far away.  I have loved you with an everlasting love; therefore I have continued my faithfulness to you."  

There are some days that I can't even bring myself to love who I am.  I have qualities that I despise and qualities I wish I could change.  But the promise from my God is that He loves me exactly the way He made me.  In fact, His word reminds me in Psalm 139 that He created me, I am fearfully and wonderfully made.  There is nothing about me that He didn't already know was in me.  My insecurities, my forgetfulness, my thoughts; He knows every single thing that goes on in me.  

I am comforted for His promise that He thinks higher than I do about myself.  Isaiah 55:8-9 "For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord.  For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts."  This encourages me because I know how I think about myself, about my future, about my present, but I know God thinks much higher of it than I do.  

I don't have much more to write about this, but I want to encourage you today.  If you are feeling lowly, not worthy, undesirable, or unlovable, you can rest assured that God thinks differently about you than you can think about yourself.  He thinks MUCH higher than you could ever think about yourself.  Give your insecurities, doubts, hopes, dreams, desires and everything else over to Him, and watch Him do more with it than you could ever have done in your own imagination.  

Heavenly Father, I am so thankful for the promises in your word.  That you have loved me with an everlasting love, a love that will never end.  I pray this over myself and anyone who would read this today:  Give us wisdom to see and understand thoughts that come from you, that please you and that lead us closer to you, and wisdom to see and understand all those thoughts that rise up against you and what you've said about us.  We take every thought captive to the obedience of Christ.  I praise you, Father, for we are fearfully and wonderfully made.  We are made in your image, Lord, and we know that you created us for a purpose, for such a time as this.  Use us where we are, Lord!  In Jesus Name, Amen!

A Thankful Heart: Day 3 - Coming in Last

It's Five Minute Friday!  Join us at Lisa Jo's place each Friday.  She offers a word prompt and we write for 5 minutes flat.  Today's word is Last.

A remarkable thing happened this spring.  I witnessed a total change of character for my normally uptight, perfectionist of a boy.  He was 7 (recently turned 8), and for those 7 years I was accustomed to meltdowns over seemingly insignificant things.  Imagine my anxious heart when we decided to put him in soccer.  What if he loses?  What if he loses IT?  

Well, his team did lose.  In fact, they lost every single game, coming in LAST at the end of the season. When we had the team party, every child received a trophy.  The coaches called each child up, one by one.  Another thing this tender-hearted boy of mine dislikes, being called last in the group.  His coach called each and everyone up, but then he said these words "we saved the best for last".  He followed that with some wonderful words about Luke being the heart of the team, but the words "saved the best for last" stuck with me.  

The best?  This was his first year to play and most of these boys had played for many years. He's not what you would consider "athletic", but he played with his heart on his sleeve each and every game.  Being the best isn't always being first, being on top, or being "the best" in deed. In fact, being the best is more about character than any other tangible quality you could have. Dear son, there are many a people who seem to be "on top", first in their field, but have no character to back up their great deeds.   

One coach told me "I know if the ball comes to Luke, he's going to kick it because he's so determined and focused."  My heart swelled with watching him grow in maturity during this spring season.  See, what his little heart doesn't understand now is that there will be lots of last place finishes along with lots of victories.  I want him to know that his performance isn't what compels others to love him, but his character, even when he is last.

I am so thankful for the growth that I got to witness over the 3 months of soccer practices and games.  From beginning to end, he grew exponentially.  

A Thankful Heart: Day 2 - A Gentle Spirit

Most mornings he climbs into my bed and rubs his soft little hands on my cheek.  He whispers "I love you, Mama."  He's a gentle spirit that most people don't get to experience.  He loves to hold my face and smother me with one hundred kisses.  His gentleness is countered with an exciting personality.  He's somewhat of an enigma, my sweet Jacob.  I get to experience and see his sweetness on constant display when it's just the two of us.  He's as much an extrovert as he is a gentle and quiet spirit.  He loves people, and loves making friends. 

I am so thankful that God has allowed me to be his mother, to love and mold this sweetness into a young man who will love and be gentle with his future wife.  He exudes joy and says "hi" to every single person that passes him in the grocery store.  He would talk with anyone who wants to listen about superheroes.  He's blunt and to the point, which I pray serves him well as he grows. 

Why am I writing all this about Jacob?  Just a few months ago, I wasn't as pleasant in my description of him.  In fact, I could point all the negatives, all his imperfections in a second.  He was getting under my skin with the constant hitting, pinching, scratching, jumping on the bed, talking loud, talking at all, and pretty much everything else about his "boyness".  

But, thanks to God's grace, I started to see that he was starving for my attention, and wanted to be held a little longer.  He wanted to snuggle up to me more, and he wanted me to listen when he was trying to tell me something important to him.  He was showing me just how smart he was, and how perceptive.  I was amazed and caught off guard one day, two months ago, when he was talking and I wasn't listening.  He said "Mama, why aren't you listening to me."  I was giving him quick yes and no answers, not really listening to his questions.  He could see through those answers to my heart.  It broke my heart and was a wake-up call to me.  

It's never easy to be put through the fire like that, but there is always refining that happens when we step into the fire of correction and growth.  God is always at work in us, and in those around us.  If we will open our eyes, we will see the significance in the small things.  

So, today, I am so thankful for my sweet Jacob.  His gentleness, his love for others, his desire to honor God, even at the young age of 4.  He blesses my life.  I make the choice to see all his positives, and when someone asks me to tell them about Jacob, may the words of my mouth pour out blessings rather than disappointment.  I will give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will (1 Thessalonians 5:18)  He is my gift from God.

James 1:17 "Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change."

A Thankful Heart: Day 1 - Seeing Beauty in the Mundane

I woke up at 8 a.m. today.  First, this is not a common occurrence in my house.  I rarely get to sleep past 7, and with school starting next week, I need to get my body back to the routine of getting everyone ready earlier.  Second, my boys did not come into my room and were extremely quiet this morning, which is why my body was allowed to sleep.  This NEVER happens.  Ever.  So, I should have felt supremely thankful...

Though I should have felt refreshed and relaxed when I woke up, I was grumpy and grumbling.  I just wasn't ready to face another summer day without a plan.  We did so much at the beginning/middle of summer that the end of this summer has been spent mostly at home, doing the same thing over and over.  I'm pretty sure I once heard that is the definition of insanity.  So, you can understand when I woke this morning, I did not have a thankful heart.  

1 Thessalonians 5:18 has been rolling over in my heart the past few days.  I believe it's the basis for this year of giving thanks.  "Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you."  However, the verses surrounding this verse have spoken to my heart, and encourage me in what my year will hold.  Here are some of the things given as instruction in verses 12-21:

• Honor those in authority over you
• Show them appreciation and love
• Do your part
• Advise those who are lazy
• Encourage the exhausted brothers and sisters
• Help those who are weak
• Be patient
• Look for the best in each other
• Rejoice always, stay joyful
• Pray continually
• Give thanks in all things
• Don't quench the Spirit
• Don't despise/ignore/spurn prophecy
• Test everything, holding onto what is good.

These scriptures have helped my focus today, overcoming the mundane, the ordinary feeling of inadequacy and apathy.  I don't want to be apathetic, especially on this first day of my yearlong challenge to give thanks each day.  

I thank God for revealing himself to us in scripture.  How can we know the perfect will of God in all things?  Seek Him out in His word.  We know that we will find Him if we seek Him, He's promised us that already.  How can we find joy?  In Him, In His presence, and in fulfilling the call He's placed on our individual lives.  

Even in just writing this, I feel that my heart has changed from grumpiness to thankfulness.  I will rejoice always, stay joyful in all things, pray continually and give thanks in all things!  God is good.  His faithfulness endures throughout all generations.  He has loved us with an everlasting love, one that will never end.  

I am choosing to spend the next two days of summer vacation doing something fun with my boys.  Their next stretch of vacation time is not until Thanksgiving.  I want to be thankful for this fun summer we've had, and close it with some great memory making moments with them.  They are the joy of my heart, the most special loves I could have ever imagined.  I want to impart to them how thankful I've been for this summer, fun days and even the mundane ones.

A Thankful Heart

Today is my 40th birthday.  I can't even believe I'm typing that number next to "my".  I still don't feel like an adult most days.  Although, I've been looking forward to 40 for the past two years, I met it with a grumbling heart at the beginning of August.  Well, actually, all summer.  It's hard to get excited about something that feels like it's on the back burner of busy schedules, summer activities and just the go, go, go life that seems to be right before school starts back.  I was starting to get a little depressed about the idea of being 40.  FORTY.  

By God's grace and words from an unexpected source, I am looking forward to making this a year of thanksgiving.  I'll be spending the year looking at the silver lining instead of focusing on the rain clouds.  I don't want thanksgiving to just be something I celebrate in the month of November, but a state of my heart.  I've resolved in my heart to write a post each day for the next year about something/someone/some place I am thankful for.  I believe that it is in giving thanks that we actually find joy and peace.  

Ann Voskamp recently wrote this blog post about how to have the best birthday, the best today, the best any day.  I can tell you with complete certainty that the words from this one blog post helped change the focus of my next year.  For the first time in a really long time, I've felt the prompting of the Holy Spirit toward something that is bigger than me, something that will be outside of my comfort zone, but will require total dependence on Him alone!  Writing this blog has been hit or miss for me, but I believe it's time for me to walk in the call He's placed on my life.  I can't sit back any longer and wish for an open door, but rather walk in what he's already provided for me to do.  Even if I only have 10 "followers", I know that I am being faithful in the small things.  

My dear friend, Megan, blessed me with the best gift this past Friday.  She went to Ann's blog and printed these awesome "be the G.I.F.T." tags and included some ideas on how to be the gift.  Ann included her list of ideas here.  I'm excited to not only be a gift to someone, but also to be thankful for all the "someone's" he's given to me.  Join me this year to be the G.I.F.T.  (Give It Forward Today).

Thank you, Father for blessing us with all the gifts you have given to us.  Help us to keep our eyes open to recognize these gifts, big and small, and to give you  thanks for them all.  I love you, Lord.  In Jesus Name, Amen!  

Five Minute Friday: Small

Every Friday, a bunch of bloggers get together in a community to write on a word prompt given by Lisa Jo Baker.  We write for five minutes, no edits, no back tracking, just pure writing.  Today's prompt is small.

Go.

Can I be honest with you?  When I saw the word prompt, I wasn't excited.  In fact, I felt completely empty of words to write.  Then, something remarkable happened.  I started getting filled up with words and they started pouring out of me.  

As I laid in my bed last night, feeling rather insignificant and small all wrapped up into one, I couldn't help but wonder what my lasting legacy would be.  Have I made a difference?  Am I worth remembering?

I am an encourager and intercessor.  Those are my gifts.  Those gifts can sometimes feel really small because it's not always recognized by others.  Many times, other people don't even know that you are praying for them.  It doesn't look the same as the person who brings dinner (definitely not my gift), or really anything tangible.  These gifts, interceding and encouraging, are important, they can just sometimes feel rather small.

I know I've spoken thousands of words of encouragement throughout my life to help others pursue their dreams, to not give up, to believe in themselves, to just hold them up when they are feeling done.  This is not small, though it often feels that way.  See, encouragers and intercessors are not necessarily the "look at me" type of people.  We often sit in the shadows of other people, and quite frankly, that's where we're most comfortable.  Every now and then, we "behind the scenes" people want to know that we're really not that small after all.  

So, I'm encouraging you, fellow encourager.  You are not small or insignificant, and neither am I. We are gifted by our Creator to do this wonderful job of loving on others and believing in others, even when it sometimes hurts us.  Even encouragers need encouragement sometimes.  So, be encouraged, you're doing a BIG job.

"Be faithful in small things for it is in them that your strength lies." - Mother Teresa

Stop.

Five Minute Friday - Lonely

It's Five Minute Friday time again!  Today's prompt is Lonely.

This word, lonely, invokes so many emotions for me.  Through the roller coaster of life, I've gone through feeling lonely, even with a crowd of people around me.  At times, I've withdrawn when I've felt like a burden or a sympathy case, leading to more loneliness.  Still others, I press through and see the growth that takes place in me when God separates me for a time with Him.

Lonely is being an 11 year old girl to a new school when all the other kids have grown up together and have deep bonds.

Lonely is being a boy who deals with debilitating OCD, when the term OCD was not known by many outside the medical community, unlike it is now.

Lonely is being with a group of friends and believing you are the oddball, the one that stands out for all the wrong reasons.

Lonely is knowing your friends are getting together without you, often.

Lonely is being a mom of a child who has meltdowns in front of people over seemingly minor things, or the mom of a child who hits instead of using his words.  

Lonely is believing no one else is like you, or that no one really likes the real you because you don't feel comfortable showing them the real you.  

I've felt those times of loneliness for one reason or another.  My husband has felt it.  I believe we all go through times of loneliness, and grow through times of loneliness.  The one thing that remains consistent, even through times of natural loneliness, is that God is always present.  He fills those voids and heals our hurts.  I've been through some of the lonely times listed above.  

Psalm 38:9  "O Lord, all my longing is before you; my sighing is not hidden from you."

God is not blind to our needs for interaction, and our need to love and be loved.  We set our lives before Him, and He grows us up, leads us and directs us through the murky waters of loneliness.  It's through these times that we lean hard on Him.  It's through these times that we learn and grow in Him.  

Friend, I have been lonely at times, and I know how gut-wrenching it can be to feel misunderstood, alone and desperate.  Let me encourage you, you are NOT alone.  God is always there, His arms always open to love on us and fill our every need.  When our eyes are focused on Him, they are not focused on us, which means they are not focused on our immediate need for understanding from another human being, but rather understanding from a loving God.

Father, I thank you for filling us with your love, peace and joy.  Thank you for loving us unconditionally, redeeming us fully and providing for our every need, spirit, soul and body! Father God, I pray that you meet us where we are, seek out those lonely hearts and provide for them the healing and comfort they need through the Holy Spirit.  In Jesus Name, Amen!

Taking the Challenge

Sarah Mae put up a challenge that I've been contemplating for a while now.  The UnWired Mom Challenge based on her ebook of the same name is a challenge to live fully present lives in an internet addicted world.  I've recognized my own shortcomings in regard to internet usage, so I feel like this challenge is at the right time for me.  I just bought and downloaded her ebook, and I'm excited to get started.  

Hoping to get renewed vision and direction for my life, and I'm hoping to refocus my efforts to my family and health.  Here's to letting go and letting God satisfy that desire to be connected.

For the Mom's of Boys

This is for the mom's of boys.  Those boys pull at our heartstrings, pull at that last straw, and pull out our laughter.  Those boys who have imagination beyond their years, who dream impossible dreams.  Those boys who fight and get dirty, who are loud and fun.  You are raising them, and you are doing something right.  When I see a mom of boys, I want to run up and give her a hug and let her know she's doing a great job, that she's not alone.  

This is to encourage you, Mama.  You, who are raising that boy who believes he's a superhero. 

That boy who believes he can fly, only to realize that gravity is real for him after his lip gets busted.

Jacob after busting his lip.  Tried to fly from one headboard to another.

For the mom of a boy who takes life a little too seriously for his tender age.  Who has perfection written on his heart and mind and strives to achieve that a little too much.  

That boy who is smarter than you are, who believes he will invent the greatest inventions ever. He can sit for hours creating and imagining.  He believes if he can imagine it, he can create it.

You are raising them to believe the impossible is possible.  You allow him to believe he can do anything.  You are doing a fine job, Mama.  So, when those days come when it seems like everyone has forgotten how to behave, or how to speak kindly, remember, on those days, that you are the mom of a boy!  When those days seem to drag on, and feel like they will never end, you are raising the next generation of men.  When you feel like you are just one more mess away from losing your mind, remember that they love you.  They love you despite your imperfections, insecurities and failures.  They will remember how their Mama loved them, and held them.  How she played with them, sang to them, read to them, hugged them, prayed for them and yes, even yelled at them.  They will remember it all.  

So, hold them a little longer for they are only little for a short time.  Let them make their messes and mistakes, and be present when they come running to you for help.  You are teaching them that we learn from our failures and successes equally.  You are teaching them they are loved even when they fail; showing them the same grace that God has shown toward you.  

It's not always easy or "fun" to be a mom of a boy.  Sometimes they believe they are the next generation of wrestlers and like to fight all day long.  Sometimes they are stubborn and strong-willed, and it takes skill to navigate those territories.  It takes trial and error, and sometimes the help of women who have been there.  Sometimes, we just need the help of a mentor, even the mom's who seem to "have it all together".  These are the things I am learning, and I'm learning more each day.  My boys are sweet AND sour.  We have good days AND bad days.  But I believe the sweet outweigh the sour and the good overtake the bad.  

Be encouraged, mom of boys.  You are not alone.  You are doing a great job.  You ARE a superhero in their eyes, and in mine, too.  Today, I honor you and hold you in high esteem as you navigate these waters of motherhood to boys.  I pray that you will be blessed each day of their little lives, and even into their adult years.  I pray that you are given the wisdom, knowledge and understanding needed to raise confident, peaceful and strong young men.  I believe you have the power to do that.  

This was a poem I found from when I was in Kindergarten.  My Sunday School class made them with our handprints for our parents.  I don't know who the author is, but I wanted to close this post out with this poem:

A Little Fellow Follows Me

A careful man I want to be, a little fellow follows me
I do not dare to go astray, for fear he'll go the self-same way
I cannot once escape his eyes, whate'er he sees me do he tries
Like me, he says he's going to be, the little chap who follows me
He thinks that I am good and fine, believes in every word of mine
The base in me, he must not see, that little fellow who follows me
I must remember as I go, through summer's sun and winter's snow
I am building for the years to be, in the little chap who follows me

Old Rhyme

What are little boys made of?

What are little boys made of?

Slugs and snails

And puppy-dogs' tails,

That's what little boys are made of.

Five Minute Friday - Story

Here we are at Friday, again!  It's Five Minute Friday time.  We write for five minutes, no editing, no backspacing, just plain writing from the heart for five minutes.  Today's prompt is Story.  Go.

I'm not good at story telling.  I'm really good a reading a story and inflecting tones to make the characters stand out.  But, I'm not very good at telling a story in writing.  This has intimidated me as a writer.  I love writing, I love putting my thoughts on paper (or online) and I love having this format for my children to one day read and understand me better.  

I don't edit myself well and feel the need to share every detail leaving the important points out so that everyone understands where I'm coming from.  I hope that I can one day hone the craft of telling a story.  I hope that my story will be written, even if it is not read by the masses.  

Here is my story in a nutshell.  I was born and raised in a small town between Houston and Galveston, TX.  I met my guy online.  He lived in Massachusetts.  We got married 6 months after meeting.  We lived in Mass and then moved to TX.  We have two boys, ages 7 (almost 8) and 4.  We will celebrate 12 years of wedded bliss this September.  Those are the logistics and I'm doing everything I can to not give you every detail of every event, because they are BIG!  

Stop.

I can't believe 5 minutes is already over.  This is the first time I didn't edit myself one bit. Honestly, I want to go back and delete it all and start over.  Haha!